True love has no expiry date
by sunil sharma

A reporter asked an old couple, how did you manage to stay together for 65 years? The woman replied, we were born in a time when if something was broken, we would fix it, not throw or replace it.

There is a beauty whenever we see an old couple holding hand, and walking together. It just reminds us, they are the hero when it comes to love. They learnt to be together even in hard times.

Creating a harmonious relationship is a work in progress, and needs nurturing, kindness and compassion for each other. The truth is, not everyone grow up being aware of these qualities. We are influenced by our education system, our societies and most importantly by our families. As a result, everyone has different needs and it takes patience, courage and love to understand each others needs.

As humans, we need to feel accepted and appreciated. Studies show that couples who learn to validate and support each other have significantly happier and longer-lasting marriages than those who do not. Effective validation can calm fear or frustration, give a boost to other’s excitement and get others to listen to their side of the story, deepen relationships, and quickly resolve arguments.

I believe there is no other relationship as deep, as beautiful and as powerful as a married couple. As a couple, listening and validating each other's viewpoint, help their relationship to flourish and blossom. This is one skill that...

1. Help others feel safe and comfortable confiding in you. This promotes deeper, more meaningful connection and increases other’s affinity towards you.
2. When you understand and validate others, they become significantly more open to your advice, and feedback.
3. A clear understanding of what someone is feeling on saying starts with listening. And It's important to learn to listen from the speaker's perspective.
4. When we are not able to communicate our feelings effectively, they cannot be met and we go through life with pain and pass that on to our children, and the cycle repeats itself.
5. The best and quickest way to achieve that mutual form of love and understanding is through validation. Essentially, validation means saying to someone, “I hear you.I get what you’re feeling, and it’s perfectly alright to feel that way.”
6. Because you are acknowledging how a person is feeling and telling them you understand the feelings they are having does not mean that you are saying they’re always right. It means to support that person and help them to feel supported and comfortable.

sunil sharma
sunil sharma is a blogger, yogi, designer, engineer and humanitarian.